The Great Bra Dilemma

What I need is a bra.
When I find one, I’ll shout, “Hoorah!’
I go to the store to look for one
but always I come back with none.
They don’t have my style ’cause I’m really picky
I don’t like them pointy, scratchy or itchy.

I can’t find a bra that I really like.
I think I’ll tell manufacturers to go take a hike
They can’t make a simple bra for someone like me
Who wants a little bit of modesty.

Is it cheap?
If not, it’s not for me.
It’s not worth it to spend a fortune on such a perplexity.

What do I do?
Go make my own?
They always make me look like a cone.
I do not like that.
The fad of pointy, poky boobs
Is one I avoid.

I like ’em flat,
I like ’em zapped
I like ’em inconspicuous
Bras are SO ridiculous!

I give up on the task of finding a bra that I like.
I can’t seem to find one that is right.
Yet, I must continue my search
For I can’t travel hippie-style.
They don’t wear bras
But I think that’s vile.

Oh, bless the day when I find a suitable brassiere!
However,
it may take a full twelve months.

April Murdock
1996